Helpy McHelperson's Helpful Blog

Helpy, help! I think that a bunch of hungries crawled into my mouth while I was sleeping and are now nesting in my belly. What should I do?

Make money running tours! You’ll need some equipment.  You need a handful of surgical steel 1/4” hex bolts and nuts, a square piece of plexiglass roughly 8” on a side, a scalpel, a bonesaw, another piece of plexiglass about 4” on a side, a power drill, some sandpaper (60 through about 300 grit), a copy of Grey’s Anatomy (the book, not the TV show), some LED lights with rechargable batteries, motion-based power generators, and a friend who is a quick study.

When you’ve successfully installed a window into your belly with lighting, you can charge rich people exorbitant rates to get a real insight into what hungries look like.  They will happily pay you a couple thousand dollars so they can fully understand hunger without having to experience it, since it sounds unpleasant.